So... is it over?

Yes, it's over...

You know how the story goes; girl meets boy, they date, they fall in love, they start loving each other... until they don't! It's a common thing, happens every day, even to the best of us. 

But what do you do with the love and affection you have left? Where does it all go, if your loved one doesn't want it anymore? 

Well, I don't know, I'm not an expert and, up until recently, I have always been the one leaving the relationship, or running out of feelings first. Which is  horrible thing either way, really. So, today, just a few days before 2024 is over, this chapter is also closed. 

I suppose I can give this love to me now, take care of myself the way I wasn't being taken care of. To quote Miley, I can buy myself flowers, I can love me better. 

But love is not an emotion, it is a decision, a choice! And when I chose to love, I create a tailormade kind of love, for the individual that inspires me to take this long-lasting decision. And perhaps this love doesn't fit me well, but I know it fits him. This was made for him, and it will always be. 

So, no, Enrique, I'm not taking back my love.

This relationship was neither superficial nor blunt, it was real, deep and sincere. And so its end was also difficult and complicated and it found us hugging and saying the last I love yous, the I'm sorrys and the goodbyes. This was a good relationship and I'm keeping the best of it, whilst learning from its worse. We had this kind of connection that you only read about in Sally Rooney's novels, and while I understand why it had to end, and respect his decision, if this was a novel and I was reading, I would probably had thrown the book on the wall screaming from the top of my lungs 

''why are guys being so stupid?!?''

And so, this is it, the end of a beautiful relationship. 

And also the beginning of my life's new chapter... maybe I'll go buy me some flowers after all! 

“Most people go through their whole lives, without ever really feeling that close with anyone.”